Toby Keith – “Ballad of Balad”

About the Song

Toby Keith, a country music powerhouse known for his bravado and heartland anthems, took a more lighthearted approach with his 2009 song, “Ballad of Ballad.” This track offers a playful, self-aware commentary on the genre’s well-worn tropes and storytelling devices.
Keith, with his signature gruff vocals and a touch of wink-wink humor, delivers a narrative that pokes fun at some of country music’s most common themes. We hear about a small-town boy leaving for the big city, chasing dreams of fame and fortune, only to find heartbreak and longing for his rural roots. These are classic country music themes, but Keith injects them with a healthy dose of self-deprecation.

The lyrics, penned by Keith himself, are filled with playful exaggeration. Lines like “Quit school in the 10th grade and I grew out my hair” and “Bought a one-way ticket, left a note on the door” paint a picture of a stereotypical country music protagonist, a young man yearning for something more. The song even references the very form it parodies, with the line “This ain’t your typical country ballad, no sir,” adding another layer of self-aware humor.
But “Ballad of Ballad” isn’t just about poking fun at country music clichés. It’s also a celebration of the genre’s storytelling tradition. The song’s structure, with its verses following a familiar pattern, and the use of classic country instrumentation – steel guitar and a driving rhythm section – all pay homage to the genre’s roots. Keith’s delivery, despite its humorous undertones, remains sincere, reminding us of the emotional core that lies beneath even the most well-worn tropes.

“Ballad of Ballad” has become a fan favorite among those who appreciate Keith’s ability to blend humor with genuine affection for the genre. It’s a song that both celebrates and gently mocks country music’s traditions, offering a lighthearted take on the genre’s familiar themes.

Video 

Lyrics: Ballad of Balad

I quit school in the 10th grade and I grew out my hair
I got me a job doin’ lawnmower repair
I met an army recruiter down at the Winn Dixie
He said “son you’ve no future, pack up and go with me”The first place we landed was a base called Balad
They convoyed our asses to a 10 acre F.O.B.
With my boots and my cover and an old m16
Two bottles of water and a cold M.R.E.[Chorus:]
Oh you’ll meet lots of new friends and you’re sure to get paid
We’ll show you the world and we’ll teach you a trade
It’s not a job, it’s an adventure, oh yes sir I got that
Ah but you never told me I’d get my ass shot at
You never told me I’d get my ass shot at
The first night in combat we went out on patrol
They ambushed our convey and we chased the asshole
We found them all hidin’ in low water ditches
And we took aim and killed all them son of a bitches
[Repeat Chorus]
Walked in on my buddy with a female M.P.
The ugliest woman you ever did see
He said “why are you laughin’, you got lots of nerve”
Over here in the desert we grade on the curve
Ah you’ll meet lots of new friends and you’re sure to get paid
We’ll show you the world and we’ll teach you a trade
It’s not a job, it’s an adventure, oh yes sir I got that
Ah but you never told me I’d get my ass shot at
Oh you never told him he’d get his ass shot at

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